Something New... Something smooth!

I wanted to take the time to talk about life for a bit. I have just got so much on my mind it really is hard to focus on what is most important. The biggest challenge for me is realizing that my studio is going to be in bye bye mode soon. It really sucks. I'm thinking of every possible way to keep it without it being harmful to a baby but it's hard to know what is best.

I been pulling out supplies thinking I will use them up real quick rather than get rid of them and that's causing more chaos in my head. The other thing is my sleeping patterns. I seem to be tired all the time... it's really hard trying to get up and get moving without something or someone motivating me. I am trying so hard to do whatever I can to make myself have more energy.

I did try something new though... this green smoothie from ABM. It has two cups of spinach in it which I imagine will make me feel like popeye.  It was my first time making a real healthy smoothie and trying one. I really like it! Thank god because its really hard for me to enjoy veggies like I should.

Also financial issues are such a burden right now. I'm pinching my pennies so tightly and I am just nervous to see what comes of all this new baby stuff. We got a crib the other day, well my dad got it for me. We have it put together and all I can think is... I can't believe this is happening. Also having it put together makes me think where are we putting it?

Every single night I have nightmares.... like crazy ones I have never had before. Last night I dreamed of chopping these evil guys heads off with a butcher knife. In my dream I was scared to do it but I thought if I don't kill them they will kill me. Craziness!

I just want to make it... and I know deep down inside I will but not knowing anything about what's about to happen is making it hard to understand what I should be doing. I feel like I need to be doing so much.

So I just felt the need to vent it always seems a lot easier to do than dwelling on it in my head.

Hope you all had a good weekend!


  1. Looks delicious!! Love some green juice.

  2. To quote one of my favorite films...

    Henslowe: "Strangely enough it all turns out well."

    Fennyman: "How?"

    Henslowe: "I don't know. It's a mystery."

    -Shakespeare in Love

    There's quite a bit of 2013 left for it all to sort itself out.

    Also, I'd love to know what else is in that smoothie. ;) Looks like apple?

    From a mostly lurking follower....


    1. thats perfect!

      The smoothie has yogurt, a green apple, and the juice of a lime.

  3. GOood tasting green smoothie? Do share! I'm skeptical lol


    1. here is where I got the recipe... http://www.abeautifulmess.com/2013/01/green-apple-spinach-smoothie.html

      but instead of greek yogurt I use vanilla yogurt and instead of coconut milk I used regular 2% (to save a little money)

      If you like green apples and sour things you will love it. The more yogurt you use the sweeter it becomes.


  4. the tiredness...i had it so bad when i was carrying my daughter. i would get up in the morning, get my son and husband off to school and work, then go back to bed. i would get up at noon to have lunch with my hubby who came home every day for lunch, then nap on the sofa. i would get up when they all came home in the afternoon. after supper i would crash on the sofa again. i could not get enough sleep. i was not like that with my first pregnancy. every pregnancy is different. fyi-if you're not having morning sickness by now you probably won't be. consider yourself lucky. my sis had it all 9 mo., and not just in the morning. she threw up any time of day or night.
    and trust me, you will make it. i was 16 when i had my son, was unwed (and w/o a partner at all), which in those days was taboo. essentially i raised him alone. i was poor, worked when i could and took whatever job i could and more or less, we of grew up together. he turned out fine. somehow we always managed to get by and have what we needed. not always the best or what we wanted, but what was essential. try to have a peaceful pregnancy for both your sakes.

    1. Thanks Willow... I needed to read that. I actually deleted 2 huge paragraphs out of this right before posting because they were a little too much to share but I will say that right now the pressure of money is on me and It is hard not to worry. At least I have my boyfriend here with me but I need him to get a job. I feel guilty taking freebies but now I'm starting to see that it may be my only option at this time. Reading this has made me realize though that I can do this on my own if I need to it will work out fine I just have to trust it and believe it. Your a very strong woman... you don't see that much anymore because we rely on people to take care of us in this day and age. I know deep down inside I do but I really need to dig in and keep my head up. Keeping calm so far has been one of my main goals but I wake up some mornings and think could this situation have been better? Now I see that it is only as perfect as you see it. I know this is the right time for me. Thanks again Willow!

    2. your welcome sweetie. if you need or would like, you can always email privately to share your concerns. i will listen.


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